Man... whatever.

Now I'm supposed to be all elated because it's Friday. Yeah, yeah. Tell you what. See the title of this post and get back to me on that. It seems like I am doomed to never have another good night's rest again. Because either I have stupid dreams that I'm a superior martial arts fighter like Jet Li, really scary and realistic dreams that make me come up outta my scarf at night, or... you've guessed it... I get phone calls. Now I find it rather odd that someone on the east coast would have me on their minds at 7:21 their time (4:21 MY TIME), with their soon-to-be wifey and 3 month old twins in their respective other rooms. What is even more odd is that the yahoo in question would send me a damn TEXT MESSAGE at 4 something in the morning West Coastian time. Here's a little confession. I'm a sucka for ringtones and all that BS for my i730. Since Jr. forced me to buy it I've been changing that crap around. Well if you have one of these nifty, juvenile phones then you know that some ringtones play louder than others. For example, Ignition by the R. plays much quieter than, say, nelly's Dillemma. Well I'm here to tell you, that's only true during the day. Ain't shit quiet at no 4 am. So yeah, my phone decided to have a disco party, lights blinkin', Ignition playin hella loud like I'm in the club or something. Looked like a mini-alien invasion was going down on my nightstand. I promptly had a heart attack. Then looked at the phone, and didn't recognize the number (because the person in question moved to Detroit). Here is the actual "text conversation" in it's uncut lameitude. Him: Hey whats up me: Who's this? Him: [name removed] Him: Misty me: yeah. its me. how r u? Him: I'm fine. me: thats good. Him: I've got to go to work now. me: uh... okay. Have a nice day. Side note: now see how nice I was? Let that silence those who are using my name synonymously with the term "Scanless Ball Busting Bitch". Side-Side note: It was 4 am and I was sleep. So I can't promise I'll be this nice once I wake up. Anyway, what kinda shit is this? He woke me up for that??? WTF? I tell you, men make me tired. You hear that y'all?? YOU MAKE ME TIRED! Damn. Why can't I ever just get some sleep? Don't niggas know I have to WORK? I have to pay attention while I'm here, just can't go mixing the tetrathionate and the brilliant green together, you know. Don't wanna spill salmonella and E. coli all over the damn desk from falling asleep. But noooooo. Niggas wanna wake me up at 4 am on some BS. As a result, I'm still sleepy. And grumpy. So le' me 'lone. Today's mandate: First and foremost: Le' Me 'Lone. Oh yeah, and send me licorice, red soda, and some more macaroni. I need more food or else I'm gonna fall out over here. Also, BOOOO to everyone who lives in Detroit. I am hereby banishing Detroit from the IK. However, if I've got luv for you and you're so unfortunate and destitute to reside in the place known as Detroit, you may apply for a Kingdom Banishment Waiver at the Imperial Kingdom Recorders Office on the corner of Central and El Segundo at the Smart and Final parking lot. Get it from the lady that sells the hot links outside. When you fill it out, state your reason for re-incorporation as, "It ain't my fault I live in Detroit". I will instantly pardon you and the square footage of your residence will be considered IK territory. But BOOOOO on Detroit all day. That is all. The Queen has mandated it, and it shall be so.