The Ruling Class: 101

Part of being in charge is knowing when to MIND YOUR OWN DAMN BUSINESS.

It’s all over the internet. Bush got his ass beat down in the Gay Marriage Ban. All over the US, the Fabulous Ones of the Rainbow are rejoicing and fundamentalist Christians are cringing and screaming “Armageddon”.

Here is where I have a huge problem with my Father’s folks. Peep game. If you cuss, you’re sinning. If you cheat on your wife (like most of those high-upppers do), you’re sinning. If you lie, act with malicious intent (warmongers, that would be you), take lives, do anything that is the opposite of right, you’re sinning. The Rainbow folks ain’t the only sinners on earth, so if you’re gonna shoot at one, you’d better put your own mouth on the barrel while you’re at it. Bottom line. Now I’ve been Christian my whole life, and the Christian folks practically had me clamoring to become a sinful heathen by the time I was 12. We’re too damn fake, and we’re doing more harm than good in that respect. Real folks get much more love, and people actually pay attention to you when you're real with it. Besides, The Good Book explicitly states that Christians are not to judge. Why? Read your Bible, smarty pants. Here’s a sample. Feel me: for all have fallen short, he who is without sin cast the first stone, how you gonna point out the speck of dust in your brothers eye when there’s a huge plank in your own, I can go on and on. So someone please tell me why is the Jesus Brigade the main ones throwing stones? If the average person can’t manage their own stankin’ lives, who are we to tell some gay dude he can’t marry his significant other? As far as I’m concerned, if you’re supporting mass murder on our own soldiers for your oil cause, then the least of your worries should be if some lesbians decide to spend eternity together or whatever. I’m happy for them gay folks. I don’t agree with it, I’m scared of lesbians. I attract the most butch, scary ones. The ones that look like dudes until you’re right up on them, and then it’s too late.

But that’s a whole other post, because I can get on a tangent when it comes to being stalked by overly eager lesbians and bi-sexual chicks. SCARY! That’s all I’mma say about that right now.

Side note: They’re playin’ Biz Markie’s Vapors on Power 106. Shoot me. Now. Thank you.

Anyway, back to my preachin’ on today. I’m sick of all my Father’s folks kicking everyone while they’re down. Why not just help them through their sin instead of rubbing it in their faces? Because if you open that closet, yeah that one… the one hidden right behind the pedestal where your Heritage Edition King James Version sits all holi-fied with the holy track lighting (so the Word is eternally illuminated thus further accentuating your piety) and the prayer cloth on top, all kinda bones will tumble out on your ass. And everyone for miles will be able to see it. The point is, ain’t nobody good but God. Jesus Himself said that. So you know what? Until you’re the ultimate Son of God, spare me your judgments. Be it of myself, of some poor defenseless gay dude, of the crackhead on the corner, whomever. I don’t want to hear it. Because you’re dead wrong.

George Bush, you’re dead wrong. Ha Ha to you, you judgemental murderous leach.

It’s time for me to go home now. Good for you, Fabulous Rainbow Ones. I ain’t mad at cha, at all.